Copyright Marinka van Holten
There are few things that an established couple can talk about with one another that lends itself to more metaphors than money. It can represent security, stability, love, freedom and even power in a relationship, and it also has the ability to detract from all of these things should they be out of balance. As well, few couples talk about how they feel about money, any issues arising from wealth or lack thereof, and what expectations they have with regards to how the other will provide or contribute to the relationship’s financial situation.
With all of these points in mind, I offer to you these twenty questions about money and love, in the hopes that they create discussion and debate amongst you, and they assist in avoiding any heated discussions later on down the road.
- How much do you earn on a weekly, monthly, yearly basis? How much do I earn? How much do we earn together, and how does that affect our income tax? How much will we earn individually and/or together in the next year? Five years? Ten?
- How do you feel about budgets? Do we need one, have one, follow one?
- Does the amount that we earn collectively cover our basic expenses? How much left over do we have every month for non-necessities, savings, education, etc.?
- What are our major spending categories – such as vehicles, housing, food, clothing, travel, work, etc.? How much do we each spend in each category every month? Every year? How much do we want to spend in each category over the next few years? As we get older?
- How much money is in our checking account at this very moment?
- How much and where do we have a savings account? How can we access it if need be? Who can access it?
- What investments do we hold, how much are they, and in whose name are they?
- What are our yearly income goals? How far off are we from achieving them? How will we go about reaching them?
- How much do we need in our savings account(s) to feel secure in case of an emergency? Retirement? Who puts money in there, how often, and how much?
- Is our money pooled together into one account, or do we have separate accounts?
- How much money can either of us spend before having to ask the other about a purchase?
- Who decides what we spend our money on? How much does that person decide?
- Who is in charge of paying the bills?
- Who is the bookkeeper for all of our financial matters in the household?
- Who does our taxes, and who in our partnership keeps track of this financial information?
- Do we have life insurance? If so, how much? Who is the beneficiary, and how do they get the money if/when the time comes?
- Which one of us takes care of the long-range financial planning, such as retirement? How do we decide about long-range money matters? Who tracks their changes, makes sure we have enough?
- If either of us have children, who is responsible for their financial well-being? Education? Long-term finances? Who has input into their financial matters as well (i.e. ex’s or family).
- Do both of us have health insurance? How? How much does it cost, and what does it cover?
- Do either of us have any debt, and if so, how much? To whom? How is it being paid off? How long will it take?
