Welcome back to the “Get The Girl” series. If you haven’t read “Get The Girl 101“, I’d strongly suggest that you do before continuing on.
“It is only at the first encounter that a face makes its full impression on us.” - Arthur Schopenhauer
Say, your out some place and you see a woman you would very much like to meet… what do you do? How do you go about making that all important first impression and hopefully strike up a nice conversation? Well in this article we will explore some tips that will help you to increase your chances of just that!
Different Styles
There are really two ways of approaching a woman and opening up a conversation, direct and indirect. Now it’s a personal choice how you prefer to talk to people. If your a go for it no holding back type of guy, then just go up to her and fire away with whatever’s on your mind. If you aren’t that guy, consider using a less direct opener. Ask her a question, or make a comment on something. Some examples of this could be:
“Do you know where a Starbucks is around here?” (very indirect)
“I love the Beach Boys (when she’s looking at cd’s, though not that one specifically)” (indirect)
“I love that cd (when she’s looking at a specific one)” (about 50/50)
“I love your shoes!” (slightly direct)
“You have a great teeth.” (direct)
More Then Just Words
Your words aren’t the only important part though. In fact it’s been suggested that as much as 95% of how people perceive our actions comes from our body language, tonality and facial expressions. As you might guess this can explain why sometimes you can say something as a simple as “Hi” and have it work, or you can say something really smooth… but have it fail. There are really a few main tips to keep in mind when approaching someone to make the most out of “the other 95%”. Make and hold eye contact, it doesn’t have to be a burning stare of passion, but strong eye contact shows confidence. Smile… smiling makes you appear friendly,fun and more attractive, theres just no real downside to it! Take an angle when approaching her. You don’t want to walk up head on, that seems confrontational. You also don’t want to walk up to her from behind if you can help it, this can feel like an ambush. It is best if you can approach her from a somewhat sideways angle, she can see your coming in her peripheral in a non confrontational way. Lastly when you going to approach her try to avoid hesitating, it’s be theorized before that theres a “3 second rule”, where you have to approach in the first 3 seconds. I find the 3 second rule silly as a rule, however useful as a tool to get you to go before you talk yourself out of it.
An Alternative
There is another way to open women however, and it involves opening them from a distance. It’s really pretty simple, you both make eye contact and then you make one or more gestures. The gestures you choose are up to you, be creative and go with your personality.I will give you an example though of something I like to do personally, once we make eye contact I smile and wave by simply bringing my fingers down to my palm a few times (I call this the “cute wave”), if she smiles back or giggles then I walk over and simply say “Hi”.
Using these tips, you should be able to get plenty of conversations started with women, on a daily basis if you like! Stay tuned for the next article in this series, where I’ll teach you not just how to get her number but how to make sure that she takes your calls and goes out on a date with you!
Also I’d like to her your own openers and stories about first impressions with women (good and bad!) in the comments. Of course questions and comment are always welcome as well.
-Dave
